奇跡。。。 希望。。。

Miracle really do happen in life, I am not just saying this now because it just happen now, but I really do... it's just that, I do believe more because it really happen to me... not only me but to me and my family... It was really a miracle, every since that my grand mother confine at the hospital and very little improvement, we are not only physically tired but also mentally tired because we always think of her and worried, because we want her to recover fast and don't want to let her feel suffer... I am not blaming my grand mother that giving us hardship in worry but she's been a part of our family for almost many years... look she's 101 years old already and I am proud...

until last Sunday morning, my dad finally decide to let her go... my father already talk to his siblings about it and ready also to tell the doctor to let grand mother go.. but when he's about to tell the doctor, guess what our doctor said? "Hey, your grand mother is very strong did you know that? heart beat is slowly beating back to normal. Medicine that she's taking start lessening. If her case will improve always in few weeks later, she's out of danger...." the Doctor said. When my father heard, he was stun, not stun of shock but stun of happiness. My father got home and told us the news we where very happy, and he also told us that grand mother somehow opened her eyes. That's a good sign right?

We do hope for miracle in life and we also do hope that miracle happen but not always. But I think we do not choose who to believe to give us the miracle we want but they are the ones' who choose us to make us a miracle. They choose who has strong belief and strong faith and that is how they help us. Don't blame your religion if they don't make the miracle the way you want it. That only means that your belief and strong faith is not enough. And you still have doubts. We all say that we have strong belief and faith in them but in the back of our thoughts if there's still a doubt (even if we don't see it) they can see and feel it. But if you feel that you really have strong belief and faith, and if the miracle that you are hoping for didn't happen, maybe the time hasn't come yet or it wasn't meant for what you are wishing for or the time has come to let go. I know a quote that "Doubt is easy to built than trust" and that is true it proves, it's always in front of us, we just don't want to see it, we just don't want to face it and we just don't want to accept it. It's true that it's easier to say than to do but we have to face the fact that, that is the cycle of life. All we have to do is to be strong.

In Life...

In life, anything can happen anytime... you'll never predict what will happen next... seconds later, minutes later, hour later, day later... Life is too broad to predict even you can predict ones' future, you somehow still cannot avoid the happenings because it's faith. But we can change our faith by working out our present, but that won't work all the time. Every second, every minute, every hour, everyday counts. Love everything what is in your life, cherish everything what you have right now before it's gone. Be contented on what you have right now, never wish more that what can give. Life is like a bridge that we are crossing, well never know there is a hole in front of it. We might fall but sometimes we are rescue by the people around us, but sometimes in life that hole that you fall is meant to happen that we cannot do anything about it but to hold on to the hope and have strong faith that we will be saved. But if there is no one there to rescue you... it's true, life is unfair it can never be fair. You'll ask the question why, but that really meant to happen. That's why cherish everything what we have right now in life and be contented...

試験。。。

Judgment day already pass... it's yesterday... it was my exam on Japanese. I really wish I will pass the exam... on the first part of the exam, I got 40/100 I need 80 points to pass >.<
My friend says that I will pass, I just hope that I really will pass... it's just that my mind cannot help but to always doubt, I don't want to think that loh~ but it kept me thinking... now all I need is have a miracle to have 80 points to pass... I really hope that I will pass too... I really need to pass... i really want... just pray for me that I will pass, I will I will...

Have faith my Angel, you will pass the exam. you will, I know you can do it... even your friend is cheering you that means they believe in you :D stay strong, don't think negative. Because the more you think it negative the more negative aura will get near you... think positive okay, positive aura will be always by your side ;) Good luck my dear Angel...

now I know...

Few years before... I never fully understand why my best friend kept me the time what had happen to his grandmother. And I've also confront him, and I told him that I thought I was his best friend and what is the use of being close when keeping things to each other. I know that there are things that shouldn't be told to others but still there are some should. Right now, me and my family are facing a big challenge of our lives. My grandmother is already living for centuries, I know it's hard to believe but it's true. Last Wednesday (December 06, 2006) was her 101st birthday... but her Chinese birthday was November 16, 1907. 101 is count on the Chinese calendar. On that day, we never thought that the shock might happen to her. I thought that I am already strong enough to face all the types of challenges in my life but I was wrong... I am still very very weak.

Right now, my grandmother is confine in the hospital. Medicine are the only thing that is pushing her to live and make her live. She can hear, feel... I know that, but it's just that she cannot wake up anymore because of the brain damage. Me and my family really hope for a big miracle, and hope that will happen. But if not, please give us the sign first before getting our grandmother. She's important to us. If she really want to release the line please give us line so we will be strong in releasing the line also. Until now, no sign is given that is why we are still holding tight the line not to let her go. I know, you guys will say 'that's life, we should learn to let go and move on' That's true in life. But it's harder doing it than say.. just give us the sign... just one sign...

None of my friend know this, unless one but still it isn't my best friend. Now I know and understand how my best friend feel when his grandmother was confine in the hospital... I am really sorry my dearest best friend, I just hope that in that time, I understand you first than confronting you... Hope you'll forgive me...

surprises....

There's a lot of surprises in life.. I thought I will always be ready for that... but I was wrong... I was soo weak and unprepare... when will I learn from those experience to be stronger than ever?

Christmas is getting near... only 15 days to go... what are you guys doing for Christmas? Hope you guys will have a great Christmas this year... ^^v

Shiken....

There goes my exam yesterday... there was a lot of people there and it's a very little chance that I might get on top... I just wish that I pass the exam I am contented and as my learning lesson to study hard everytime so I won't have hard time when big exam come....

And as for those bad memories, I really wish that I have an amnesia for they will be gone... I know I know that, that just running away from my problems... but I don't have a choice already so I think that as a solution in my life... am I thinking that I cannot carry those problems in my life anymore? I hope I still can... just like before.. even in my face you cannot see it...